6 Tips for Raising Successful Children
Of course there is no handbook on how to raise children at the same time that does not mean that parenting can’t be done successfully. It’s important to know that every day in our lives we are given opportunities to practice being better than we were the day before. This is true in many aspects of life, even in parenting. When it comes to raising children the chance to have a positive impact and make a difference in that child’s life can exponentially change everything. The ability to make an impact positively is an amazing privilege. Think of the parents that have raised influential people. Did they truly have an idea how amazing their child would one day grow up to be? Did they see the potential early? The question many people may ask is how did they do it?
If we want to raise better children then we must be better parents.
I am by no means saying this is an easy task or that something can be fixed in one day. More so this post is about helping parents to recognize the things they can do differently to help their children to be successful.
6 Tips for raising successful children:
- Encourage and support We must first start by nurturing the behaviors we want to see. Speaking positive things into your child’s mind and heart. When children color they may color outside the lines, the dog may colored purple, trees may be blue and the sky may be green. We still say “Great job”. We shower them with compliments, happy tones of voice and praise. The child sits feelings satisfied and happy with themselves and you. We are fostering a relationship of support and care. These things are important in building self-esteem, self-worth and confidence. Parents must build into their children a strong sense of self and confidence to face the obstacles that the world may bring. Encourage them over and over again.
- Focus focus focus What we give attention to can create more of what we want. If we are constantly focusing on what is not good we give energy to that issue, this magnifies it times 10 or more. When a parent continues to focus on what is wrong or not good the parent can also bring the child’s attitude about themselves down which has an even more destructive impact. Practice looking at what went well. Emphasis the small and large achievements and accomplishments you want to see more of. This can positively reinforce more of what we want to occur. We all may like some type of praise for our good deeds. This does not mean that you ignore the problem or things that are not going well. It just means approaching the problems and negative behaviors differently.
- Modeling, lead by example Parents are some of the most influence people in their children’s lives. Yes there are outside influences and circumstances but you as the parent are the primary model. It helps to display the behavior you want the children to match. If the parent is fighting and shouting or being negative then the parent is indirectly teaching the children those very same behaviors. Those are not the qualities parents want for the children to model. If you want them to be different you must be different. Model the behaviors you want to see. Being positive, communicating adequately, behave in a way that you can be proud of as well as helpful for the child to see. These are more helpful behaviors to model for the child to follow.
- Be consistent, don’t just talk the talk: It may be hard for a large family or a small family to be consistent in keeping with a daily schedule. The idea of having a schedule and sticking to it can be difficult but very supportive of creating structure in the home. Think about the benefits of having more structure and order in your own life and how it positively impacts you. Now apply that same principle to your child. If they have order things tend to improve for them. Consistency in scheduling is important just as in discipline if a punishment is given. Sticking to your word shows reliability and it teaches the principle of rewards and consequences.
- Break bread Yes eat! Food in itself is such a communal thing. Bring the family together and make or share a meal. Have family dinners minus the TV trays, cellphones, and game systems. Stop with the closed doors and everyone eating separately or at different times. Come together, share and learn more about each other. Hear the highlights of the day. Hear the low points and come together to create solutions and explore options. Problem solve as a family. Eating together can be great bonding time. You get the chance to eat and be filled in so many ways. The mental food of stimulating conversations. Emotional food creating emotional support from one another.
- Play Time: Have family game night. Spending time bonding, let go of the work week and enjoy some good quality time together. Have family jokes. Create family traditions and laugh together. All this can create a closer relationship with you and your child. Just as adults seek people that provide comfort and support, quality relationships between the parent and the child are highly important. Children that have healthy relationships with their parents are less likely to participate in unhealthy behaviors.
Experience this kind of personal growth by contacting us at @ FHC.
Flourishing Hope Counseling PLLC is a Kingsville, Texas Private Practice.