A punch, jab or kick may get you more than you bargain for, keep your feet on the ground and learn how to counter those knee-jerk reactions to anger successfully.
Throughout life, you will come to find that we are creatures of habit. Sometimes our natural habits are not always the healthiest choices or actions. Sometimes our immediate behavior choice is anger.
It’s fair to say that we cannot prepare for every moment of the day, week, month and year. Technically we can’t even plan for the next minute as to what will happen in our lives with 100% accuracy.
Do moments that stir up intense emotion happen to us? Yes, will other moments happen that jumble our emotions on the inside yes! The good thing is we do not have to give in and make anger our natural habit.
You may find yourselves acting without knowing or thinking. You may simply be responding to the stimulus around us. Things can come at each one of us so quickly that we respond out of habit and impulse. The same messages we were told as children about thinking before we speak/act are still very relevant today. Being able to check our emotions before we respond is a must.
Anger is a secondary emotion. Many of us do not think about it in those terms. Let’s go a little deeper and see where your anger is really coming from. Under anger, you may find that you are really feeling more emotions such as frustration, jealousy, irritation, fear, sadness and doubtful. There are just a few of the many emotions that sometimes hide under or disguise themselves as anger.
It takes 21 days to form a habit. I urge you to be intentional and practice handling your anger differently. When you notice that you are feeling angry stop, ask yourself to label the underlining feeling. When you have correctly labeled the feeling think, how can I handle this emotion without being harmful to myself or others.
Additional things you can do when you find yourself feeling anger or other intense emotions bubbling up:
- Take a timeout
- Be assertive about your feelings
- Consider a healthy option
- Return with a cooler head and heart
- Regroup and gather yourself
- Think about how you would like things to go and how you can gently encourage that outcome.
Experience this kind of personal growth by contacting us at @ FHC.
Flourishing Hope Counseling PLLC is a Kingsville, Texas Private Practice.